on lost innocence

each time i look into myself, i find myself missing the child/ he was what defined me/ i cherished the child/ i loved being the child/ i even called myself and loved it when someone called me like that/ they called me mon which means son in my language/

and then when i look into myself, there's this ugly creature rearing its head/ i can see its head in the darkest of hours/ even in the most inappropriate moments, i find myself without the child inside to guide me/

how i crave to become the child again/ the innocence/ just once more/ just once more